To all you men who still use religion as an excuse to mistreat women. Young religious leaders are correcting our society’s wrong perceptions about gender inequality.

Two weeks ago I attended a Friday sermon at the mosque in the local university here in Port Loko and was so happy to see a young imam leading the Jumuah prayers that Friday admonishing the congregation about the teachings of the Prophet Mohamed (s.a.w) about the responsibilities a man has towards his wife. This sermon was among the best I have ever attended, especially since many men still use wrong interpretations of religious teachings to continue to keep women behind.
The sermom stunned the congregation, you could see people's faces! As we left the mosque that Friday everyone (men and women) was chatting about how stunned they were about the Islamic teachings related to marriage and how men should treat their wives especially when it comes to household decision making. The following Friday the lead Imam told us that word reached out about the great sermon and that he has received several requests from other communities who would like the sermon to be delivered to their congregations.

Among the teachings of the sermon some that stuck to my mind were the following:
That it is forbidden for a man to beat his wife. According to the prophect (s.a.w) the worst you’re permitted to do when your wife has really angered you is to take a soft hand kerchief and tap it on their back no more than three times.
It is forbidden for a man to make decisions about his home without consulting with his wife and getting her agreement on the matter
It is forbidden for a man to take a next wife without the willing consent of his existing wife (yes!)
A man must strive to be his wife’s best friend and confidante. It’s great to see a man and his wife playing and having fun together.
He went on to say the prophet (s.a.w) teaches us that a man must share in household chores like cleaning the house, cooking and washing clothes.

This sermon was revolutionary, since then I have promised myself to never miss another Friday sermon. It is great to see one of the strongest social institutions in our country taking centre stage in the fight for a world where women are treated equally and with the respect they deserve.

Religion is one of the most important aspects of any society. It’s role in guiding us to live in a way that respects our body and soul and in a way that respects the lives of those around us cannot be overstated. Across the world, our country is known for its uniqueness when it comes to different religions living together in peace and harmony.Yet, many people continue to use religion to make excuses to justify why it is ok to continue to keep women behind.

I was once in a vehicle travelling from freetown (this was close to the national elections) and the conversation about whether or not a woman should stand for president came up. It was a very difficult conversation as almost everyone (including most women in the Poda poda) agreed that Sierra Leone cannot have a female president citing that women, when given power become arrogant and that women themselves always refuse to support their fellow women when they stand for leadership. A man went on to argue that even religion justifies women should be behind men because in the creation story Eve was said to have been created from a man’s left rib. These kinds of arguments, especially when people misuse religion, make me very sad.
These attitudes on a national scale continue to stifle girls’ and women’s potential and thus lead our poor countries to miss the great opportunities we all know are true when women are empowered and encouraged to take up leadership and actively participate in their homes and communities. These attitudes keep women from being able to bring forward contributions that can make their workplaces and communities better.

The ideal woman is seen as the woman who is quiet, who does not voice out her opinions, as the woman who must obey every word of her husband. What ends up happening is that most young girls and women in our offices and homes make every effort to obscure themselves and their views as much as possible. It is often seen as sign of a weakness in a man when the man actively participates in undertaking home chores and consult his wife in matters of decision making.
The difficult thing for me is that I am still not able to see the benefits that come to us as a society for keeping women behind, and from being active and fully contributing participants their homes, classes, offices and communities.
Even more confusing for me is that when you look at statistics on gender, the poorest countries are too often at the top for not empowering their women when some of these countries (line ours) has more women than men. Poor countries like ours (especially) cannot afford to continue leaving women behind. We cannot afford gender inequality neither in our homes nor in our offices.
This Friday sermon has completely updated my understanding about the teachings of my religion when it comes to gender issues. I feel well armed to face any of you crazy men (and women!) out there who still think it is ok for us to continue to keep women behind.
Happy women’s day to all the great women (especially my beautiful mother) in my life and to all women out there striving to make a difference. Well done to all of us forward thinking men striving for a more equal world. For the others, why not join us!